Stick it!

Do you ever feel like hiding under a rock? Like your against the world and you just feel like sticking the finger? I feel like that right now.  Had a Hectic week, went from an accident to figuring out the rest of my life. Stuck with a delimma of choosing between a for sure paycheck with no freedom to infinite freedom and an unsure paycheck. It's between being happy and being unhappy. Should I stay unsatisfied with promised pay or happy and possibly poor? I have my husband, but I dont want all the weight on him to be responsible for the household. Granted I'll be utillizing the benefits of doing my service in the Army. I'll be back to being a Full Time Student and hopefully a Part Time Job. Sometimes I wonder if I'm being selfish and thinking about my happiness than a secure future for my husband and I. Maybe one day a Family. I can reclass but happiness and satisfaction is still unsure. All I'll ever know is my time so far in the Army. Should I just take the Risk and keep this lifestyle with little or no Bumps as far as finance? Or should I follow my lifetime goals and just persue my degree and trade my ACUs in for Scrubs?

 So much, so soon. I've been waiting for my ETS date to come. But the closer I get, the more nervous I get. Wish I could know the outcome of each choice and choose. If only life were so simple and easy.